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Anastasia

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    • Historical Events

  • i so lurve my new hair now awaiting lioness to upl...
  • there is so much more i want to say & write but if...
  • im a sadist..confirmed by my couz.. im a beast..wo...
  • i miss those times when me hninn & sophie wud sit ...
  • happy times @ bbq desu...
  • kkk not time to loose!!! these are when we went pu...


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    Thursday, November 29, 2007


    mentioned i went giant on monday ...

    today after they finish printing am following them to bukit batok juz fer the sake of wasting time there ... can go shopping ma ... can even visit pops house if he at home ... miss him sia ... nyahahah ... on sunday was working and eating alot alot ... on saturday was working and eating quite alot also ... when i say eat i mean eat chicken ... many pieces aof chicken is considered alot right? right ...

    friday went to school ter do project and asked penguin to help me submit mc then went with pineapple to see kelvin at engine ... thurs had ebm presentation ... wed went to see doctor so had mc ... monday submitted project ...

    Love is a great thing
    If only you knew..

    Published at 3:20 PM


    Wednesday, November 28, 2007


    ok this bloddy teacher is maknig me suffer on my own ... i hate him .. and what i hv read in pretty's blog ... seems like she this her fav subject ... well it sucks to the core ... no offense ... im here trying to figure out how to complete this bloddy lab successfully but the dumb teacher is just too hopeless ... he thinks everyone has brains like einstein and thinks all are damn hardworking as pretty ... well i very well are not ... get that in your head you dumb ass crazy old haggot ... the more i stay in school doing dumbo lessons everyday the more i hate it .. the more i regret it and the more i emo ... last time i emo by crying during that asshole's lab lesson ... then i emo by writing that in my blog ... then i emo by asking chicken her opinion ... i emo everyday just like wad im doing at this very moment ... sucks ... listening to mak's story made me realise how lucky and unlucky i am ... lucky coz i get to continue studying, the way she would want to during her time ... unlucky coz i dont get as much freedom as she did during her time ... im not very independant nor i am too dependant ... i do not have that much freedom to always go anywhere i want during my free time and do all the things i want ... i dont have such friends as close to me or have the same characteristics or interests as me ... they all love shopping ... maybe too much ... i love it too ... but sometimes i find too much shopping really spoils you ... you become more selfish and self-centered ... im damn well looking forward to friday where i have the most freedom as compared to other days in the week ... i love my fridays ... one thing is because im enjoying my storytelling ... i get new experience and i love to experience new things as long as im not the laughing stock or not the center of attention ... after that i can eat anywhere i want with sexy ... i like being with her coz i like to see her tomato red face ... also i miss her lots more now that we are in different class and that i dont go morning lectures anymore so i see her less and less every week ... its one thing about being lazy to wake up early to go to school and its another thing when you are in pineapple's shoes ... yea got him a new name alreay coz of his hair ... im not interested not one bit about this it stuff and thinking of dropping out when time comes for me to get an internship as part of my course ... must go through that to get the diploma ... okay i have to stop for now ... i need to concentrate fully on my msyd project ... its a big pain but im grateful im working together with pretty ... alrite i have to chao ... bubyez ...

    Love is a great thing
    If only you knew..

    Published at 12:55 PM


    Tuesday, November 27, 2007


    printer out of black ink ... think tomorrow can go buy ... but wait ... nyahahah ... my card only have like 10 bucks ... and my wallet have like another 10 bucks but thats fer school ... lol ... okay i can be considered broke ... but at least i hv enuf to eat ... hopefully ... nowadays i spend alot on food de le ... my appettite going fm bad to worse ... getting bigger ... even kak mas fm my workplace say im getting fatter ... she say last time i was skinny ... kurus ya know ... cant help it wad ... last time ppl kept asking me ter eat more and more ... and guess wad ... i am ... n now ppl look at me and can see i eating more ... so obvious ... and getting fatter and fatter ... not taller ... sobx ... haiz ... maybe the type of food im eating is de wrong kind? maybe im eating too much a time? maybe im not eating enuf vegs or fruits? tell me!!!! if not how wud i noe wad ter do ... haiz ... sianx ... today tues ... yest mon ... like duh! ... yest went giant de one nearest my house wif lioness n penguin ... went dr bought many things amount to 23.50 ... woo ... a lot sia ... lets see if i can rmb wad i bought ... OMG ... suppose ter blog while printing but print finish oledi ... OMG din noe it wud end so fast ... okiez am tired wan slp ... nitez ppl ... swiit dremz and hv fun tml ... plz wish me luck ... hope i dun emo again like i did today .. tell ya al bout it tml yea okiez bubyez ...

    Love is a great thing
    If only you knew..

    Published at 11:28 PM


    Monday, November 19, 2007


    the moment i heard there would be a lab test next week, then that guy said two weeks after that there would be a written test, tears started to form in my eyes. i wanted to just pask my bag and get out of here asap. i wanted to go toilet to cry as much as i want and not have a car ein the world about other stupid stuff. many times i felt like quitting school. told a lot of people. many times mentioned to mak and ain that school sucks to the core and i want to quit. i really want o quit. many times i tried telling mysrlf, "hey you are really lucky you know a lot of children in the rest of the world not as lucky as you to get so much chance in education. look at your mum for instance, she wanted to study so much but she wasnt given any chance at all. even that old guy i talked to in the outlet while working told me how lucky i was." but the stupid school and education system aint making my chances very easy izzit. i hate school. i ahet my school life. most of all i hate tp. no longer am i going to samba anymore. it sucks. complained bout it to ain and mak. school sucks too. work is enjoyable. i love my job. maybe i can, l want to consider being a full time staff there. i want to quit school and work there. for the rest of my life? no i will try exel in oher things. i wan to be a professional ice skater, i want to be able to play all kinds of sports i never could imagine myself doing like water sports like... fuck shit teacher left and now im crying like mad. lucky no one saw. even the stupid teacher came in didnt see me. im invincible. man i was so in a hurry to take out tissue that i took 2 at the same time. wasted sia. my 3 years of my life really was ted sia. shit im breaking down again. damn damn so damned. i was late to submit my indivudual shitty assignment for this stupid mdbs subject. i have to hurry and print out my thing and put it in her stupid pigeon holy ass later. really ar i feel same as yan chen. he and i are both wasting our time here. just that i never told him coz i feel he can make it. i know he can. just needs a little more motivation and lots of guidance from his fellow teachers and peers. dont include me please. you think such a small person like me can take so much pressure. im already breaking down at my 2.2 fucking semester and you want me to give him support. fat hope. not that i dont want to. i cant. cant take it anymore. no more. no more. i want to cry. i want ot go home and rest and cry to sleep then i want to eat free lunch and eat medicine and sleep some more. then when mak ocmes home i will be fresh enough to give her a welcome home greeting and kisses and then have some fum family time massaging her back and legs and i wan to play with rawiyah and i want to sleep peacefully at night and i dont ever want to go school ever again. i sont care if they wnat me out. i want out. maybe this is running away. who cares. i want out and i want to be home to be able to read and watch news and then pray 4 to 5 times a day and not have a care in te world bout studying and doing project or whatever whit that i have to do right now juzt to stay on track with the class. im not feeling well. i feel im getting fat and i do look like i am but im actually losing weight. why? i keep wanting to do things that are impossible for me but why? the brain my mind is so complicated but why? cant god make it much simpler? no he cant. i dont know what im saying. i wan to cry. just go home and cry like a small little girl breaking down just because she can take the stupid fucking pressure and feels like running away from it instead of facing and overcome it. i feel so hopeless sia. but im very, so very lucky to have such good friends, they skip lecture coz they wanted but we all could hav egone for it if not for me not having to finish my project on time. still havent submitted it but its fine to me. im so fine by it. im so fucking dead meat cos i will most probably fail this subj and i want a retake but not in block mode. if next sem i retake still in block mode i will call the school anad ask to leave. i want out. now. plus this aint making me get better. my cough got from bad to worse. well mostly coz i keep skipping my medicine time when i work coz my medicine makes me feel drowsy and i cant feel that way when im working. have to be 100 % well and alert etc. i love working. will do anything to stay in that job. i feel like quiting when ym internshio starts. i dont ever never want towork as it staff. i hate it. why i chooce this? yeah it was my 5th and last choice let me tell you something. when i first looked into the book of poly's and their couses i couldnt find anything, not one single bullshit course that i like. none i tell you. none. then i saw this aerospace thing and read the description. doesnt sound too bad so i msde it my first choice. chicken butt in and said she wanted to be in same school as me. at that time it was impossible. i lived in tampines and she in ang mo kio. i dont plan to travel all the way ther everyday just for school sake no way. i did that for my o level. it sucked. the stupid air con too low. my fever us up. im not crying anymore thats good. once i get home maybe i will. not sure. should i eat later. even if i eat i cant take my meds. didnt bring them. i feel so freaking hopeless. i wan like so happy yesterday while working. i really enjoy working and wish to commit more. i makes me happy coz all i will ever think about is making my customers happy. none of their actions will effect me whatsoever. my collegues are cool too. they are way too cool. anyway so far no problems with my job. just this freaking school. problems at home? with rawiyah. shes just spoiled and i hate that about her. yea maybe im jealous but well who knows. and im not treating my mum with enough respect. its been a long time since i kissed her cheeks. must do that tonight. show how much i appreciates and love her. thanks to blogger i feel way so much better now. if only that teacher will stop teaching i will be so much alright. still feel like getting out every now and then but not crying anymore. thanks a lot blogger. you helped me alot alot. chaos.

    Love is a great thing
    If only you knew..

    Published at 11:12 AM


    Tuesday, November 06, 2007


    hey hey in kab session again ... tutor asks us to sit in groups and discuss bout assignment ... i think it sucks ... lots of confusing things to understand and lots of things we are not very sure of ... many things we dont even know needs to be done ...

    btw lets continue from what i stopped yesterday ... the tragedy ... as we were shopping around in the first clothes store i received a message from mak ... it said ... wait let me get my phone to give you the exact message ...

    message goes ... mak miscarriage, warded tonight ... i was so sad ... i was so looking forward to her giving birth and then i wanted to take care of her ... second time already you know ... the first was only around 3 weeks or so ... this one was 2 months ... 2 months le ... sobx ...

    i didnt cry coz i was shopping in public ... and i cant cry in front of my friends ... so we went shopping as usual and i bought a bear for her ... when in the train thought i shed some tears ... but it was silent and i try to make it unseeable for others ... cant find the word to describe it so i dont know if u can understand that ...

    having little flu today ... mango thought i crying coz she saw my blog bout mak's miscarriage ...

    that was on thurs ... on fri had same storytelling ... made two new girl friends ... only have like 4 to 5 coz am not sure whether theres another gal who came previous week ... then bought bubble tea and walked around to big bookshop ...

    went back to school to meet pretty to do msyd ... then rahman our other teamate came wet as wet dog ... do do finish go home ... he treated me and pretty something for being late ... i go tmy papaya yay ...

    sat sun work as usual ... yest school as usual ... aft school went to lab to do ebm and msyd ... today just on time for school ... hungry coz only drank little tea ... came school tired and fluish ...

    anyway me, sexy, pepper plan to get lioness her late present ... i provide de binded book and sexy will print out the photos so we will combine and make a nice photo album just for her ... see how nice we are ... but i think the mor ethe merrier ... can pay lesser ... i thought of asking mango and pretty also ... not including penguin coz sexy hates her ...

    pretty, mango, me, lioness, penguin presenting either tml or thurs ... eh but wait ... thurs got deepavali ... but i aint working .. n de ppl here dun wan go sch coz dey wan hol fer themselves ... so im damn free ... wad do i do? i have ebm to do ... i can go take neoprint with ain ... yay my day is planned already ...

    will go for my last samba practic next week ... i wont blame them if they kick me out ... been skipping samba a lot and i gave stupid face last time i met them ... so i wont blame them if i dont get to perform on fri also ...

    i have make-up lesson on fri right after storytelling ... oh ya another work to be done ... search on fairytales ... sucks big time ... okok ... tts it fer now ... bb

    Love is a great thing
    If only you knew..

    Published at 10:19 AM


    Monday, November 05, 2007


    now having lab session in school ... mango sit beside me kpo-kpo ... found out i vv boliao ... today wear my new head band cherry style ... i vv retro i know ... mango bought bunny bag one time ... she vv silly ... buy fer wad sia ... she say same thing also ... last wed have samba prac fm 6.30 to 9.30 ... went home tired ... sianx ... samba no longer fun as before ... next day got school as usual ... aft that went shopping ... as usual i bought most things ... two make-up stuff ... go with lioness n penguin ... while going round the vv first clothes store ... tragedy starts ... tell u again nxt time ... gtg ...

    Love is a great thing
    If only you knew..

    Published at 12:22 PM